Dogs! How they bring joy!

I never grew up with a pet, unless you count two goldfish and my little sister's hamster "Ben" which I was not a fan of! The friends that I had love

d their dogs, and family members treated their Fidos with more compassion and care than their human bloodline! I could never wrap my head around how people could treat animals better than people....that is...until Figaro! (Well, and Macy)

We all crave love. We all want that someone that can't wait to see you when you come home from work. Someone who wants to cuddle up to you, take runs together, share time, and be goofy together. Sadly, in the case of family, friends, and spouses, it rarely happens; or if it does, that happy, smiling face fades as the years drag on and the novelty has worn off. Those goofy times, runs, and cuddles take a backseat to the responsibilities and schedules of daily life. Not the case with dogs! No matter how many times you leave the house and come back in the front door in a day, it's like they haven't seen you in years! They greet you with a wagging tail and smother you with kisses before your shoes are even off and ripe for the chewing! That unconditional excitement to see you floods your heart and somehow make you feel that no matter what is going on in your life; everything will be alright.

My last relationship was very emotionally and psychologically abusive. The only peace I had was when I was praying in the closet or when taking care of Macy (not my dog), and Figaro (my last love bomb from my former beau). Even though the pups could sense the tension and darkness in the house, when it was just the three of us, we not only got along famously, we were happy, even if it was for a few hours. Dogs live in the moment, and this is a valuable lesson I learned during my heinous 7 months separated from my family, friends, environment, and support system. I watched how the puppies could be aggressive, sick, and sometimes shaking in anxiety one minute, but as soon as we were back to just the three ladies, it was all play and smiles!

One would think that after leaving my situation, I would want to forsake any reminder of my time of of anguish, but I couldn't leave my precious Figaro! If I had it my way, I would have taken Macy with me too, but alas, she was never mine, so that was not an option. After my UHaul was packed, and my car on the dolly ready to head out, Macy and Figaro had their last "chase and bark" around the vast property as tears streamed down my face. I didn't want to have those two lose each other, but leaving Fig wasn't going to happen just as taking Macy wouldn't either. Then I recalled how resilient they were because they could (unlike me) live in the moment. Putting Fig in her kennel, she was shaking and scared, just like me. But after ten miles on the road, the shaking ceased and she was curled up sleeping without a care in the world. She calmed me. If this little 8 pound ball of soft, curly fur could accept change and an uncertain future, why couldn't I?

The journey form MN to MI was chocked full of craziness; being hit by a semi, searching for hotels that allowed pets, the time where I thought I lost my car off the tow, the snowstorms......it was definitely stressful for me, but Fig? Nah! She was so stoked to meet new people and stare out the window with her tongue hanging out, looking back at me every so often as if she were saying, "Look Ma! Isn't this a fun adventure?!" I had never driven a big ol' UHaul before, let alone with a car attached to it. My dread of living the way I had been, trumped my fear of freeway driving, but it still wasn't easy to make this trip. My nervous system shot, no food or sleep for days, still grappling with how horrible a man that I loved could treat me so badly, put a cloud of sadness over every mile. I would lose myself in thought during the travels. "How could this have happened? I was so careful and waited before moving to get married. I thought I knew this person! I bet my whole life on building the family that we all said we wanted. No more gardening, no more homestead that I worked years on. No more family movie nights. No more, well, everything!" I would panic at the thought of having to restart my business and whole life over from scratch at 45. I gave it all up to be a family, but instead was bamboozled, devalued, and heavily abused.... then laughed at, mocked, and blamed for falling for it. The only time I could snap out of this woe- is - me thinking, was when Fig would poke her nose through the kennel prompting me to pet her and allow her to give me kisses. What a blessing she is.

Coming back to my home state, knowing that I would be a guest in the old family home was no picnic either, especially since previously, it had been a no-pet household. To my surprise, it only took one day of Fig's charm to soften the heart and is now more popular than any other family member I can recall! I am in awe of how one little puppy not only helped comfort me in THE toughest test of my lifetime, but in the process also brought joy and love to so many since I have been back. She gave me the reason to stay calm on the road, gives me the drive to push towards a successful, fruitful life, and is in many cases the reason I get up in the morning. She counts on me, and I will not let her down. She deserves a great life, and in her own way, she shows me that I deserve the same. Love comes in many forms, and for a girl who never experienced this kind of loyalty, comfort, or attention from a mere human, I have to say that finally, I can call myself a proud puppy mom.