Dental Rape Culture

I just finished up recording my audiocast pertaining to my histories with dental professionals. It is quite emotional to speak about, and puts me in a mindset of helplessness, anger, pain, betrayal, and sadness. I do my best to block the experiences in my mind; but have the constant reminder of what happened to me. From bleeding mouth, inability to chew, sing, or speak properly to the pain and stench of what I am forced to live with for going on 10 full years now.

The only publication that describes with accuracy the feelings and other horrible outcomes from the events that occurred in the dental chair, with multiple providers, is an article from Zed Zha, MD titled, "Consented: A Doctor's Call to End Medical Violence and Reclaim Patient Autonomy."

I want to make clear that not all dental providers are bad. I have met some very kind and honest ones. The honest ones are the same ones that are horrified at what I went through but admit that they do not know how or are not qualified to help get me back to function. I appreciate their honesty and hope that more providers in the dental industry take note and follow suit. I won't get my hopes up though.

I'm sure if you're reading this, the headline is what grabbed your attention, so I will not delay in explanation. The article by Dr. Zha made full sense to me and I was grateful to have found it. Just having this subject addressed gave me comfort. Sadly, there are not many professionals that deem this subject as important enough to highlight in professional industries. This topic needs more attention.

(All quoted words are directly from Zed's article and I encourage you to read it in whole by going to zedzha.com)

" Unlike rape, medical rape culture is not a crime, nor is it the conscious doing of any individual. And both patients and clinicians are victims of it. It is a pervasive and insidious medical environment that trivializes and normalizes the denial of patients' bodily autonomy. It shares common grounds with homophobia, racism, and sexism."

In many medical and dental settings, this is what I have endured especially as a recovered patient of eating disorders. Not only has my medical history been ignored, it's been laughed at and dismissed as 'silly'. In advocating for myself, I was met with snide comments and sexist statements meant to make me feel small enough to shut up and "let us do what we know how to do". Only to be told later, "Well, we only know what we know" when their treatment caused more damage. I was harmed. A lot. And have been required to not say anything "or else". Or else I will be blacklisted as a patient. Or else, we will delay your treatment. Or else............

" Some hallmark symptoms include 1) bad treatment consent, 2) patient blaming/gaslighting (including fat-shaming), 3) medical misogyny, 4) body objectification, 5) pathologizing gender/sexual diversity, 6) medical racism, 7) trivializing sexual trauma, and 8) workplace misogyny."

I have personally experienced all besides #5 on this list. The worst part is the hierarchy. There is a clear power differential when you allow a professional to aid in your care. You are taught to trust the provider. When that trust is breached, you are now faced with almost guaranteed dismissal, abusive treatment, or adverse remarks said not only to your face, but noted in your chart. That chart follows you around indicating to any other provider that sees you, that you are the problem. Nowhere are clients/patients allowed to speak their side unless it is in a legal forum. And many will opt not to use legal remedies due to laws protecting providers as well as the patient having to relive horrifying treatment.

I will not pretend that I am not responsible for screwing up my body. I did. I engaged in eating disorder behaviors for so long, that my body permanently changed. I didn't complain about the pain in recovery. I didn't saddle doctors with unrealistic expectations. I stayed pretty silent during the difficulties in recovery for a few reasons; 1) I didn't want to bother anyone, 2) I was ashamed, 3) I thought I deserved the pain, 4) doctors didn't understand anyway, 5) I was treated as less-than even when I did seek help.

There came a time when I was misdiagnosed so often, and my wishes ignored so much, that I had to start speaking up and documenting. I had no problem bringing in articles about my conditions, transparently telling providers every disgusting detail of my former behaviors, and even helping them find other doctors to collaborate with. All those efforts were fruitless because I was not a doctor or dentist. So, what could I know?

The lack of listening and understanding led many professionals to cause more irreversible harm, but instead of an apology, a refund, or a solution, I was made to sit through mocking, lies, gaslighting, and demeaning treatments.

For someone who spent most of her life staying quiet through abuses so much that she almost starved herself to death, I was now a fully cured anabulimic/alcoholic and taught that having a voice simply didn't matter either way.

I had paid the price for what I did to myself, but did I now have to take on new ailments too that were not my fault? Simple answer: yes. That is the expectation.

Just because providers are not well versed in eating disorders isn't an excuse for being bad at their job. Treating a patient isn't about just getting the work done, it's about getting the work done correctly for the patient's health. Dental treatment shouldn't be about the dentist's reputation or pocketbook, but about the actual care they provide. How can anyone give proper diagnosis, service, or treatment if they refuse to validate a patient's history by simply listening to them and taking it seriously?

I was robbed of over a decade of my recovered life due to malpractices, misdiagnoses, and minimalization of my reported symptoms. I did everything possible to ensure that I wouldn't be a "problem" patient. I would come in smiling, talking, and positive. I was understanding, willing to collaborate. I didn't whine or complain, even when in excruciating pain. I figured, many providers probably hear that all day, and I wanted to have them want to help me. This, in my opinion, made things worse. Because I didn't scream and cry, my pain levels were ignored...because I wouldn't outwardly show it. The nice demeanor must have indicated that they could do the bare minimum with me, and I would accept it. Did I think about screaming and crying? Yes. But thinking it out 10 steps ahead, I could imagine them putting things in my chart that were untruthful, delaying or cancelling future scheduled appointments, and even telling other providers not to work with me for being dramatic. So I was stuck. I stayed true to myself and kept trying to find the right providers that would actually benefit in my quest for better health. I found myself.

I will be writing of my experiences on this blog, but not today. Just recording was enough to sap my energy and spike my memory of certain events. Since I have to get ready for work, I have to get the images out of my mind and make sure I am able and ready to help my clients with their health goals. See? It's not always about me......my priorities are my clients, just as it should be in any other profession that impacts a persons' health and life.